Learning Patience

I have never been a fan of patience.  At least I don't think so.  But if you were to ask others they would say you have so much patience.  I don't really.  I hide everything from everyone until I can't hold it in anymore, and I either scream or cry .  Not only that, but I like things done my way.  If you do it wrong, I will go behind you and correct it.  I never realized I did this until my daughter pointed it out to me one day.

The biggest challenge i have with patience these days is learning that I can't do things the way i used to.  Simple things like trying to sweep the floors, drives me insane because I can't just do it and get it done.  I have to take breaks, which is crazy to me.  It hurts my arms and my legs go numb and burn in pain within a couple minutes.  Then my ribs will spasm from my back around and under my breasts.  Just from the sweeping motion.  So I have to be patient, and take several breaks, and it takes me forever to get anything done!  Then I am exhausted from sweeping of all things, and I am done for the day then.

It is crazy how much chronic pan has changed my life!  With everything I do, it takes so much longer to get anything accomplished.  Patience is something you must have or you can drive yourself crazy.  I do this to myself a lot.  But I am learning.  That is the best I can do.