I am in this essence of calm for now. Trying to keep myself there is a job! As I went through a week of intense therapy, I learned a lot in a short amount of time. Now to keep myself there from week to week until each session of support.
Last week I learned I took other peoples problems and made them my own. Therefore, really taking on a lot of stress. trying to manage that kind of stress is so unhealthy for anyone, but especially for me! With fibro, any stress increases your pain, and I was making my pain worse.
Secondly, I learned that I have not dealt with my past, thus it is interfering with my present. I thought I had dealt with everything and put it behind me and moved forward. But I realized I just pushed it to the back of my mind and it is just sitting there still affecting how I think and do things without even realizing it. Well now I do, and it is time to actually deal with it.
Third thing I have learned, is I have several encounters, or things that have happened in my life that have caused post traumatic stress disorder, that I didn't realize what even happened to me. And this needs to be dealt with carefully and with a professional that can understand that I have been through a lot of things that any one person would be lost just going through one of these issues.
So I have learned a lot. And I am taking it all in stride. One thing at a time. Working on communication first as that is my biggest problem. I never ask for help, I never say no. So some hard work for me.
Physically I am doing okay. I have had a headache for about eight days now. It doesn't go away. I am not sleeping well at night and I am tired. I am sore in my back and neck and around my ribs, but I can handle the pain so far. I do attribute some of the pain to the weather. It is so cold here. But overall I am not screaming in pain, and I am able to kind of control it through my breathing. If this would of been before, I would be in bed screaming in pain. I am doing my best to maintain.
I am a fighter. I am strong. I am kind, compassionate, and unique! I will survive! This is my life!
Last week I learned I took other peoples problems and made them my own. Therefore, really taking on a lot of stress. trying to manage that kind of stress is so unhealthy for anyone, but especially for me! With fibro, any stress increases your pain, and I was making my pain worse.
Secondly, I learned that I have not dealt with my past, thus it is interfering with my present. I thought I had dealt with everything and put it behind me and moved forward. But I realized I just pushed it to the back of my mind and it is just sitting there still affecting how I think and do things without even realizing it. Well now I do, and it is time to actually deal with it.
Third thing I have learned, is I have several encounters, or things that have happened in my life that have caused post traumatic stress disorder, that I didn't realize what even happened to me. And this needs to be dealt with carefully and with a professional that can understand that I have been through a lot of things that any one person would be lost just going through one of these issues.
So I have learned a lot. And I am taking it all in stride. One thing at a time. Working on communication first as that is my biggest problem. I never ask for help, I never say no. So some hard work for me.
Physically I am doing okay. I have had a headache for about eight days now. It doesn't go away. I am not sleeping well at night and I am tired. I am sore in my back and neck and around my ribs, but I can handle the pain so far. I do attribute some of the pain to the weather. It is so cold here. But overall I am not screaming in pain, and I am able to kind of control it through my breathing. If this would of been before, I would be in bed screaming in pain. I am doing my best to maintain.
I am a fighter. I am strong. I am kind, compassionate, and unique! I will survive! This is my life!
