Monday, December 6, 2010

Confusion

I am so confused lately, actually for quite sometime.  My life's journey has been sporadic at best, sometimes even crazy would be the best term to use.  Sometimes the things worth living for the most can drive you to the brink of insanity.  Children, spouses, grandchildren, relatives and friends.  Why is it the ones we love most hurt us so deeply?  Forgive me if I am acting strange, I am not in a place of despair.  I am just thinking.

I try to be the best person I can be, but sometimes I think I could do better.  I caught myself purposely making my daughter and husband angry with me.  Why would I do that?  I am not sure of the answer.  Is it because I feel taken advantage of in so may ways from them at times?  I don't know, it is possible.

Lately my pain is so deep, it feels like icicle's running up and down my legs scrapping the whole way.  What can a person do to deal with this?  I don't really know how I get through because I know meds don't work.  The pain in my groin is so intense it makes me clench.  I have a double ear infection that hurts my jaw (TMJ) my neck, head and side of my face. 

As if i didn't have enough to deal with!  I try so hard to pretend I'm fine, that my husband roles his eyes if I say anything.  How would that make you feel?  I know I hate it, and it makes me think, do you really love me?  I mean, I know he loves me, but is he in love with me?  I don't think I can say yes to that anymore.  Which really breaks my heart.  Then I ask myself am I in love with him or do I love him?  And I can't answer that anymore either.  I struggle with so much, I get confused and I am unsure of everything.  I don't trust my judgement anymore.

Looking back at life I see all this ridicule, and hurtful words that have gone on between the two of us.  I think I have just been afraid to even think about it.  I feel I have failed him as a wife, which who cares what other people think, but is that what he thinks?  Intimacy has been out of the question with the areas of pain I have for the last year.  And I feel he doesn't care anyways, which as a woman is insulting to me.  This is pretty private to be putting out there and he would be pissed, but he don't read this anyways so it don't really matter.

I used to work as a behavior analyst for the state of MN.  I always had my shit together, not really.  On the outside it looked like it.  I was so good at hiding my insecurities and I was so proud that I could accomplish what i had in my life.  Meanwhile inside I felt as if I were dying, and I know a couple people knew, but for the most part I looked like I had it together.  I thought I felt strong then.  But I wasn't.  I was probably more vulnerable then, than I am now.  I worked with dual diagnosis clients and frankly sex offenders.  Everyone would ask how I could separate myself from the offenses that the clients had committed to work with them.  I just did.  They were people who had issues that needed help, and that is how it was.  With everything I have been through in my life it is odd that I ended up working with that clientele.  I think it was the search for understanding.  Which I don't think anyone can really understand it, but I tried really hard.  I have this part of me that needs understanding of others and their actions that kind of keeps me going.  Injustice is something close to my heart, and I feel like I keep thinking if i could just find something to connect with to understand why, things will make sense.  But telling a person that you molested them because they threw rocks at their pig, I don't even know what to say!  What kind of response are they looking for?  I will forgive you for throwing rocks at my pig if you forgive me for what happened.....FUCK!  Sorry, it is incomprehensible!  So yes as you might have guessed I am talking of my self.  How rotten and horrible is that?  I guess I thought if I could understand where that kind of person is thinking, I would be able to move on.  For the most I have, but it needed to be said.  there is no reason to hide it as far as I am concerned.  It happened, its in the past, I can't change it, it's part of who I am and who I have become.  And to be honest, I don't mind who I am.  I feel I am a strong enough person, with well meaning intentions with any relationship I have.  If people don't like me for who I am, then that is their problem and not mine.

Pain is covered by what I hide inside
Is God really on my side
I am down on my knees
begging you please
can you help me
Could it be any harder to face whats true
for I feel I am living my life without you
If I can get by just one more day
I promise you I will try to stay
If you take a look at my face you'll see
I've never left, would you look at me please
If our life is over, it will be ok
For I know I will see you another day



1 comment:

  1. It sounds very painful. And looking for a connection, an answer, making things correct, sound like something I do hourly. Fibro is real, chronic pain syndrome is real and it can be the most aweful pain you have ever felt. So, take care of your self girl!

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